Have Yourself a Nerdy Little Christmas

I love bargain shopping.  Nothing better than spending a rainy Saturday afternoon poking through the endless racks at places like TJ Maxx, Marshall’s or Ross.   These stores are the reason why I wear Lucky Brand and 7 Jeans…not to mention the 16 out of 32 NFL jerseys that I have.

Anyways, in addition to finding legit clothing for 75% off, these stores have AMAZING house goods sections.  I have calphalon pans because of these stores, and you can always find awesome nick-nacks or drink mixers.  Anything from funky plates to funny pepper grinders can be found here.  Of course, this includes an endless supply of nerdy stuff.

I’ll admit, I’m a fan of Star Wars.  The original 3 movies remind me of being little and pretending to fly the Millenium Falcon when I’d play make-believe with my dad.  Cool flicks, total classics.   For example, check out my sweet-ass Mr. Potato Head known as DARTH TATER:

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sorry the picture is a little dark, but you get the idea.  I love Darth Tater.  He rules.  Along with funny face, he guards my stuff in my room against evil-doers.

So I’m in TJ Maxx the other day, and I come across this gem. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh yes.  It’s a Star Wars Holiday Nutcracker.  Since I can’t really see inside the box because it’s wicked dark, I laugh my ass off for about 3 minutes and then decide to open the box and take a picture of what’s inside.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
I’ll take “Best thing to have in your house that will prevent you from ever having a girlfriend for 500″, Alex.  If this thing wasn’t 25 bucks, I would have totally bought it and used it as some kind of white elephant thing at Christmas time.  Too bad my dad would probably go Bat-S crazy for it, and since my mom is a total fan of nutcrackers (seriously, it’s a tie between nutcrackers and snowmen with that lady), she’d probably be cool with him having this gold-mine of a conversation piece sit on display at Christmas.

Might have to go back just to get it.  Why do I always find this random crap when I’m out and about? 

Hey, nerds like walnuts, too, I guess.

I Love Seeing Things that Remind me of my Friends

I love it when I’m out in public and I see something or something happens that totally reminds me of a good friend.  Like the dude who was blasting “Tripping Billies” from his Audi A4, who had a Seahawks border around his “JANKY” (literally, it said “JANKY”) Washington license plate, right B?

Anyways, it seems like I’m always seeing stuff when I’m out that will make me think of a friend.  Since I’m still stuck with this god-awful-can’t-hold-a-charge-worth-crap-POS-LG-flip-phone-with-only-redeeming-quality-being-a-camera phone, at least I’m able to capture said photos and share them with my friends.

I had to post a few here, just to show how awesome the phenomenon is.

1. Texas Pete Hot Sauce

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was in Minny a couple weeks ago, Rissa talked constantly about Texas Pete Hot Sauce.  So, I saw it in a grocery store a couple days later and had to acknowledge that I not only found it, but that I’d be mailing some to her ASAP.  I should try it, too….hmmm….

2. Oregon BOOTS!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I seriously would have bought these if they hadn’t been 2 sizes too big.  I was walking through Marshall’s yesterday, looking for a new pair of dress boots, and lo and behold: Jesse’s team in the form of loud footwear stood before me!  I think I actually screamed out “OREGON!!!” when I saw them, too.  I searched the whole place high and low for a pair that was closer to my size and I even asked the shoe-department lady if there were any others in the back, but no luck.  The people around me must have thought I was crazy.  Seriously…so awesome.

 

I love anything that reminds me of my friends.

Avoid Sweet Tea Vodka at all Costs

I like things that taste good.  Good steak, good beer, good desserts….love it all.  I put ketchup on pretty much anything and everything because it tastes really good (desserts excluded, of course). 

Last weekend, I ventured out to Minneapolis for the first time in my life to hang out with some wicked awesome friends of mine.  (There will be a separate entry to chronicle that trip, of course.)  On Saturday night, Rissa, Chad and myself were at the local UMinn booze depot deciding on what to enjoy that evening.  After mulling it over, we decided on two cases of Coors Light and the Piece De Resistence: Burnett’s Sweet Tea Vodka.

This stuff is brilliant.  It’s just as potent as regular vodka, but it literally tastes like sweet iced tea.  Very happy with our decision, we bought the bottle, took it home, and proceeded to come damn near close to killing it between the three of us.

The evidence speaks for itself.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Remember: you booze, you lose, kids.

The Adventures of Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!)

Wednesday nights are usually the night that I do laundry.  Tonight was no exception.  Since I’m taking a four-day trip up to Minneapolis on Friday, I especially had to get some stuff clean.  Little did I know the rare sighting that I would have while at the local Sudsville:  SUPER NERD (YELLOW SWEATER!).

Name: Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!)
Alias: Carlos
Age: 7 years
Height: 4’5″
Super Powers: Can dance to the rhythm that he sings out loud, while leaping off in a blur of navy blue and yellow, thereby distracting his enemies and destroying them!
Characterized by: Navy Blue shirt, khaki pants and Yellow Sweater used as a cape
Can be found at: Local yacht clubs, the Loch Raven Sudsville, the local school playground

Behold!  Our first sighting of Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!)!  He checks his surroundings.  All seems quiet for Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!).  He senses he is being watched…

Our hero, Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!) senses danger by the adjacent dryer.  He gets in closer to get a better look….still feeling as though he is being watched….

He is on to our game of spies and trickery!  He knows that his true identity will be revealed!!!   In one swift move of blue and yellow, he leaps away, flying off to foil the plot of another evil lint-trap monster!

WILL Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!) destroy the heinous squatters at the Sudsville?  Will his singing and dancing scare away evil-doers?

We may never know…..godspeed, Super Nerd (Yellow Sweater!)!!!

I Like Funny Signs

Since I have the maturity level of a 5th grader (on a good day), I get such a kick out of seeing signs that have gentalia in the name or have some kind of other funny suggestive meaning.   This entry just contains a couple pictures of signs that I have personally seen and taken pictures of, for the LOL-factor.

Leacock County: This picture is funny for two reasons: 1. Leacock.  hehehehehe, and 2. “End Brake Retarder Prohibition”.  No clue what that means, but it sounds funny as hell.  This was taken right in Amish Country, Lancaster, PA.  Awesome.

I’m actually thoroughly impressed with the fact that I managed to get both signs in the same picture, and both signs read clear as day.

Which brings me to my next gem:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh yes, my friends: Blueball Ave.  I see this awesome sign every time I go into/leave Philadelphia…it’s goes right across 95 as you enter PA (or, in this case, leave PA) and I crack up every single time I see it.  I have a few friends who should probably live there.

 

I think I’ll come up with more, but I’m currently trying to not sob myself to sleep over the fact that after the Sox took it up the collective tailpipe from LA, Kyle Orton forced Tom Brady to bend over and squeal like a pig in overtime.

Later much!

I Love Beer.

Is there anything better on the planet that you can consume?  Seriously.  I have recently come to grips with the fact that while I love GOOD beer (Guinness, Dogfish Head, other various snobby versions), I will forever be a fan of cheap beers.  Pabst, especially.

No, I am not a hipster.  And since when is it suddenly cool to go all emo and have a PBR in your coozie?  Posers.  I’ve been drinking this stuff since I was, like, 17…errrr, 21.

I think this is because cheap beers remind me of outdoor concert events, vacations on the beach, BBQing with friends, and college.

 

Cheap beer lovers unite!!

Blast from the Past

Since my phone charger decided to randomly die about a month ago, I have been forced to get back together with my ex-lover, aka the LG POS.  Don’t get me wrong, I think LG makes awesome phones, but this one is all cracked (apparently my car + my phone = car wins), and the battery life is about 20 minutes…oh, and that little metal thing that you plug the charger in..yeah, it falls out.

Anyways, this LG has one sweet, redeeming quality, despite the fact that Zack Morris wouldn’t even use it:  It has a camera.  With the sudden popularity of networking sites which fully promote the “what are you doing RIGHT NOW” thing, I have become a little obsessed.  The fact that I can take a picture of myself and upload it to facebook or twitter or whatever is awesome.

So, I decided to go through my pictures and see what the heck is on it….just for fun old time’s sake.

First off, what the heck kind of low resolution did I have my phone set to in order to take this?  This is from 2006, when I came into work one Monday, and my friend, Dan, had done a mock “chalk” outline of a dead body in masking tape on the floor at my desk.  The poor cleaning lady actually thought someone had been shot there.  Mind you, the person had to have been about 3 feet tall, but whatever.

Yeah, this is just funny, and I’m sure I have texted this gem to many of you.  I’m a genius for thinking this was soemthing that I should take a picture.  hehehehehe

Sadly, this wasn’t one that I took, but one that I had saved.  LeeAnne, Hudak and myself freaking love this part in Home Alone 2 when Marv gets electrocuted.  It was on TV one night, so Hudak took a picture of the TV and sent it my way.  Awesome.

I think I need to call AT&T and find out what kind of an upgrade I’m due for.  Camera must be included.